I could not ask for more

You all know the song.  I could not ask for more, blah, blah, blah.  I have always, always hated that song.  Everyone in my age bracket was using it for a wedding song and were all dreamy and in love.  I (ever the cynic), rolled my eyes and kept right on wishing for more, hoping for more, dreaming of more.  In fact the more I tried to convince myself that I had everything I could possibly ask for, the more my heart protested that there were SO many things that I was missing.

I set out on a journey.  I found a boy who was a dear friend and who had been chasing me pretty much since he met me.  I looked at him and thought, "no one will ever love me as much as he does.  After all, he's been chasing me for YEARS even though I have given him no indication that I wanted to date him."  In fact, I went to my senior prom with said boy and I am fairly certain that the video is floating around somewhere in which I said that I wouldn't marry him if he was the last man on earth.  So, what did I do?

I married him.  And I bought a house.  And I had a baby.  Because that's what you do.  And this thing over here that I had stuck a pin in?  It decided it didn't want to be pinned anymore.  

Fast forward through a lot of years and a lot of crap and a lot of back story that is in no way shape or form interesting...because I'm nothing if not succinct.  HA!

Today I was humming along to this tune in my head and all of a sudden I realized that it was THAT song.  The one I hated.  And all of a sudden.

I got it.

I packed a lunch and kissed goodbye to a beautiful woman that I am falling for in a ridiculous way.  I put on a new skirt and new shirt that I bought this weekend (guilt free).  I left my white picket fence house and went to work at my completely stable job.  I had a very surreal conversation with my ex-husband about his impending engagement with his new girlfriend.  I talked about diamonds and honeymoons and if my child was going to be a flower girl.  And I felt nothing but thrilled for him to find someone who made him happy.  I picked up my amazing kid from daycare who calls me mother and is pretty much the best thing on the planet.

I literally have every single thing that I could possibly have ever dreamed of, along with some things that are everything I didn't know I wanted. And finally, I understand what all those silly girls were talking about all those years ago.

I have all I've waited for and I could not ask for more.